How to access joy when feeling nothing?
If someone can summarise one purpose in life, maybe it would be something similar to this, "find the joy in it".
Joy is happiness. Joy is contentment. Joy is bliss. We work so hard on whatever way to achieve it and fight for it in our lives. But sometimes we might get lost in this searching process, or even fell into the trap of emotional numbness or even find ourselves feeling nothing before we experience what joy is.
"E-motion” is energy in motion.
There is no good or bad emotions, each of them come and go like a flow. But emotional numbness is different, feeling nothing is an emotion in stillness. This form of energy is trapped inside us and block us completely from accessing joy, and we would start losing our motivations, passion and purpose on everything in life.
To access ultimate happiness, we all need to learn how to tackle this nothingness feeling. One of the most effective way on doing so is, remember what joy really is.
Activating 3 different types of joy
1. Situation joy
This is the joy you felt when you experience something makes you feel excited and want to share and spread the happiness to someone else. You are able to feel this joy because you manage to find the value of your authentic self, the part of you makes you feel alive, refreshing and have the openness to receive every love you encounter by just saying “YES!"
An invitation to situation joy:
"What comes to you mind if you remember the happiest moment of your life?"
"What is the thing you can do now without caring about any results, how other feels but just have fun?"
"Visualise you’re laughing like a kid, would you be with someone else or by yourself? What are you doing?"
Breathe and focus on your heart centre, it’s okay continue to feel nothing. Use the above questions as your inspirations, be curious and opened. Invite your intuition to guide you how to feel again. Maybe there’s something you can do, or someone you can meet which helps you to access this joy much easier. Follow and honour whatever comes to you, all is well.
2. Non-situation joy
This is the joy at a deeper stage of consciousness, you need not depending on any outer circumstances nor anyone to feel it. It comes from inside, from the compassion and loving feeling you give towards yourself. You might not have or need a word to describe it, yet it brings you wearing a content smile on the face. You own this joy by not having it but being in it.
An invitation to non-situation joy:
Sit in a comfortable position, with a mirror in front of you. Start gazing into your own eyes and breathe into them comfortably. Be curious on this you as if meeting a new friend in your life, breathe into what is beyond those eyes.
“If you see your most authentic self beyond these pair of eyes, how would he/ she be like?"
“If he/ she got a message to you now, what would it be?"
“If you can do something you deserve the most now, what would it be?"
Continue to be in the silence, accept and allow whatever comes towards you, all is well.
3. Sympathetic joy
In the presence of this joy, you are able to be completely focus out and be with the feeling of someone else you love and care so much. You feel this joy when experiencing other's passion, success, and breakthrough in life. You celebrate with them authentically without any attachment at the same time understand everything you are celebrating for is also part of you. This is the most profound joy, and most sustainable one. When we be in the joy of others, we instantly feel the joy of ourselves.
An invitation to sympathetic joy:
Show up, put yourself in the community or some situation you feel comfortable with. Be with the people you love, who can share the positive vibe to you. Celebrate their lives and feel their feelings, feel their happiness.
Be opened to receive the support form others, laugh with someone you love. Let go of any expectation, accept everything is happening as how it suppose to be now. Believe you deserve this joy you receive from others, this is where you can generate yours instantly. It can come in a way which you might feel overflow that you need to give to someone else too.
No matter where you are at, remember this:
"Joy is our birthright."
Set a simple intention “I can be joyful” and start tuning towards it. Breathe into it with the inspirations above, be with where you are at. Being able to feel is a choice, being able to feel joyful is simply remember something you forgot. Believe you always have the power to cultivate any kind of positive feeling inside you. Be patient in the journey while exploring it, sometimes, feeling nothing is still a loving feeling, only if you breathe into it with love.
I experience my first sympathetic joy in life coaching, “ bliss” might be the closest term I can use to describe how I feel. It motivates me much to continue sharing and supporting people around me, this is how we expand the joy like a ripple to everyone around us.
Feel free to find me for a chat if you need one, I am willing to keep you accountable in your journey.