Are u you a positive person? Do you want to be one? Why and why not? For sure, we all want happiness in life. Being able to identify and have better understanding on what positivity and negativity helps us move towards this happiness faster and easier.
People always classify me as a positive person. I was meditating on this last week and discover some wisdom behind positivity and negativity which I'd love to share with you today.
Before we dive into it, let’s have a quick look at how a person with positive & negative person feel on 2 very common scenarios we encounter in daily life.
In the moment you found you’re missing a very important call because of something happened unexpectedly e.g your daughter is crying, your phone is dying or network just suddenly gone...
A negative person would feel nervous, anxious, angry and can’t breathe.
A positive person would feel would feel nervous, anxious, angry, despair, judgemental, disappointed, rejection... and also can’t breathe.
In the moment you recognise you’re in a situation of complete unknown e.g searching for new career, breaking up from a 10 years relationship, losing control on your financial freedom, being diagnosed an incurable disease...
A negative person would feel fear, worried, insecure and can’t breathe.
A positive person would feel fear, worried, insecure, impatient, weak, guilt, shame, sorrow... and can’t breathe.
What’s the different between positive and negative person?
As you can observe, there's no big difference between how a positive and negative person feels, or the only difference is positive person would get triggered even deeper, feeling even more layers of negative or disturbing emotions and encountering the most negative mindset they've ever experienced before.
To be positive, is not equal to blind fold our feelings and fake it by telling the world "i'm ok". It came from an open-heart, understand it's really ok to feel not ok now. At the same time, to shift and bounce back fast. How to achieve this? Practice makes perfect is the only solution, practice to get intimate with your emotions, practice to strengthen the ability to feel and back to your heart anytime anywhere.
Go positive = Shifting into a different state of mind
Yes I accept I'm a super positive person, while the truth is I feel the most deepest dark too, and it's not sometimes but always. I'm grateful I'm conscious on how to handle the lowest point and bring me back on track fast by focusing on the followings:
1/ Have courage to feel
The first and last thing about mindfulness is always back to the sacred pause and breathe. To gain back the awareness on what is happening truly behind what I see, I found myself always train myself to build the ability on pause and doing nothing instantly when I got triggered. I allow myself to dive deep and feel beyond all emotions without running away because I know the more opened I allow to feel and the deeper I go, the quicker I can transform these emotions into calmness and the sooner I can create another reality I desire.
2/ Rest when feeling exhausted
While in this process, it can be very exhausted like riding a roller coaster. I might find myself shift back to high frequency in hope, joy, freedom even bliss and next second my fear can suddenly flush in and drag me back to doubt, struggles and resistance in a much deeper level. I learnt one thing in this journey. Pause again, but this time, allow me to simply rest. Recharge myself with a deep sleep, massage, sun bathing and play. Let my inner child leads me to the state of knowing nothing, not even need to handle any emotions. To embrace the purest part inside my heart. Again, the quicker I allow this rest happens with unconditional love, the faster I can back on track again.
3/ Coach thyself
Once I rest enough, yes it's necessary to back to feel again. It's a discipline and commitment to feel if we want ultimate happiness in life, while be persistent at the same time be super gentle to yourself too. I found the more gentle and flexible I can be, the easier I back to the +ve me gracefully. I allow myself to use whatever techniques I feel most comfortable in that moment to assist me. I coach myself by seeing my shadows, projections, patterns and transform them to forgiveness, appreciation and gratitude through meditation, journaling and all other emotional techniques I resonate in that moment. We're the only one can heal ourselves, strengthen this ability and knowing is how we can always maintain to be positive anytime anywhere.
To start, simply aware of this truth, "I'm the healer of my life."
This never came from the pride or the ego, we allow ourselves to see the weakness and knowing we're not weak, we allow ourselves to receive supports and guidance at the same time use them as the tool to heal thyself in the most effective way. To remember and fully awaken this healer inside you, I'm happy to help. My intention on mindfulness coaching is to guide you how to be the best self-coach and healer in your life, to find the most comfortable and easiest way to handle all negative moments. Feel free to reach me out if you need guidance on this anytime, my heart with you.
Blessing from my heart,